I aint got long to live
by XxFutureWWEDivaxX
Summary: I aint got that long to live Life says that I'm going to die. So, what's going to happen to us? Before forever I lay to lie. Do I need to be dead Before a tear slides sorrowfully down your eye. 'Cause when I'm dead, I'm gone Maybe and only then, you'll start to cry.


_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except the storyline. The characters belong to Stephanie Meyer and the poem belongs to a great New Zealand poet, Keed Marmye.**_

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_I aint got long to live  
Life says I am going to die._

She glanced around the room full of her pack brothers, her mother and step father and the elders that she had looked up to. Still looks up to. The pain hurt so much, everything had gone bad, and she knew it had once the vampire had gotten a hold of her. She knew she wouldn't be able to withstand for much longer. She knew her time was coming to an end. Was she scared? Yes. But had she accepted it? Yes.

"Sis, please hang in there longer. Please. I don't know how I'm going to live with you not by my side, please. Just don't give up…" Seth gripped her hand and she squeezed it with all the strength she could muster up. He had said this to her so many times in the past couple of days. But she could not answer him; she could not promise she would stay here with him, with all of them. But she always answered Seth, just to see him slightly smile once again.

"I'm trying my best BooBoo…." She tried to smile, but the muscles in her face wouldn't allow it. Seth slightly smiled at the childhood name that she had given him.

"I guess that's all I can ask for..." Seth mumbled, his hand let go of hers and he quickly wrapped his arms around her, being careful not to hurt her. "I love you so much LeeLah..."

"I know BooBoo… I love you too"

_So what's going to happen to us?  
Before forever I lay to lie…_

Jacob looked at her with so much intensity. The tears threatened to fall down his face, shock and anger welled through him. He was going to get that leech for harming his love. He promised himself that. He owed it to her, to himself, to everyone.

Carlisle walked in. He was the only doctor that the Pack had trusted enough to let help Leah, even if he was a leech.

"Carlisle, have you found something? Anything to help Leah?" Paul begged. His eyes were glassed over and his hand was being squeezed by his imprints.

A look of sadness washed over his face and Jacob knew the answer before Carlisle could even open his mouth to speak. "You haven't?"

With a shake of his head the vampire doctor walked over to Leah and asked if he could hold her hand. With a nod of her head, Carlisle took her hand and held it gently.

"I'm so sorry Leah Clearwater. I have researched everything I can possibly think of. I tried myths, Legends. Everything. But not once has a shifter ever been bitten by a Vampire…" he paused as a sob had escaped past Sue's lips, he glanced over towards Leah's mother and a look of remorse crossed his face "The tests I had previously done on you earlier this morning show that the venom is slowly making its way around your body. Usually, the venom doesn't take that long to travel through the human body, but you Leah… since you are a shifter, your body is naturally trying to fight it off, to heal you from the pain you feel. But sadly, it's not enough…"

No one said anything for a moment, not one person did. Everyone just stood in silence. It had dawned on them, Leah Clearwater –the headstrong she-wolf- was not going to make it out of this battle alive.

"T-Thank you, Doc" Leah whispered. Her hand then dropped from Carlisle and went to find comfort in her brothers. Her mother was right beside her, begging for her other hand. "H-How long?"

It didn't really matter to Leah how long she had left; she just knew she was going to see her father again. Leah had only asked so she knew how much time she had to prepare for her goodbyes.

"If my calculations are correct…" Carlisle stated "tonight."

It had been a few more minutes before Leah decided to speak up again, her gaze instantly travelled to Jacob Black. The sobs had echoed throughout the room from every imprint as well as the pack. Everyone had tears in their eyes. Everyone, except for Jacob Black. Leah knew why too. Jacob Black never cried. Never.

"I want to speak with Jacob" Leah breathed. Her chest was rising and falling heavily with every breath that she took. "Alone"

Seth placed a kiss on his sister's head and she whispered something in his ear, all the pack members heard. Everyone.

"I love you so much BooBoo..." Leah kissed his cheek as she brought her hand up to cup her brother's cheek and then proceed to bring him in for a hug. "Stay strong please Seth. For Mum, for everyone. I'm not going to make it until tonight Sethy... My body is slowly shutting down. But I want you to remember one thing…" she breathed in and wiped a tear that was falling from her eyes "I want you to remember that there is life outside of the Rez and I hope you get to experience it more than I ever did. I hope you get to live life and grow old with the one you love by your side. I want that for you Seth, and when your time comes to visit me again, I will be waiting for you. I love you so much BooBoo, more than anything in this world. You were the one that kept me going through everything… you were the one that kept me strong... I love you so much..."

The tears cascaded down Seth's face as he held onto his sister tight. He didn't want to let go. He wanted to hold his sister, to protect her. But he couldn't, not from this.

"LeeLah…You are the strongest person I have known in my life. I love you so, so much." He could not say anymore as he began to let the tears fall down his face and the sobs escape past his lips. He placed a long kiss to his sister's forehead before running away from his sister, out the door and down the corridor. It wasn't long before everyone heard a loud crack echoing throughout the house.

"I love you Lee…" Sam breathed "I always have…" and with that he bolted in the same direction as Seth.

Embry and Quill walked up towards Leah and they each placed a kiss on her head. They couldn't say any words, none. How could they say bye to the woman that had constantly been there? They couldn't.

"I love you Leah…" Embry breathed before he walked of the room. Quill following closely behind.

Jared slowly made his way up towards the woman he had come to admire so much in a short amount of time. He couldn't say anything, he couldn't even mumble an 'I love you' as the sobs and tears poured out. He just kissed her head and slowly made his way out of the room.

"Paul…" Leah cried. Paul had become Leah's best friend when she first phased. He had taken care of her, showed her the ropes. Stood up for her. He was there for her when her father passed on and he was the one there for her when Sam constantly thought about Emily. He was the one who Leah could trust with her life.

"Lee" Paul breathed. He took her hand and held it tight, nothing but pain etched in both of their facial expressions. Leah Clearwater and Paul Lahote pressed their foreheads together in an act of respect and love for one another. This had started off when Leah had asked Paul to dance with her at Sam and Emily's wedding, and it slowly became their thing. "I can't say goodbye to you Lee. I just can't"

"Then don't" Leah whispered "Don't say goodbye to me Paul. Just say 'I will see you again soon'"

But Paul just shook his head and placed a friendly kiss on her lips "I love you Lee. My best friend. My she-wolf" no more words were exchanged as Paul left the room.

It had been a while before the room was clear. Everyone had said what they had to say. Billy had told Leah that there will never be anyone like her again, that she was the strongest woman he had ever come to know. That he had ever had the privilege of knowing. Old Quill went on to add that Taha Aki would be very proud of Leah for the way she conducted herself as Alpha Female and Beta.

Jacob watched as Leah cried with her mother. There were no words exchanged, just sobs and tears. Only one word was uttered at all "I love you"

Finally, Jacob looked up to meet the eyes of Leah Clearwater. No tears had fallen from his eyes, not one. This pained Leah to see; shouldn't he at least feel some sort of sadness for this? They were in love. They had been for the past two years. They belonged to each other.

_Do I need to be dead  
before a tear slides sorrowfully down your eye  
because when I'm dead, I'm gone.  
Maybe and only then you will start to cry. _

"Jacob…" Leah muttered. Her eyes closed as she felt and heard Jacob getting closer and closer. She could smell him more clearly now.

"You okay babe?" Jacob asked, he began to fuss over her. He began to fluff her pillows, tuck her in. Make sure that she was comfortable.

It was then that Leah Clearwater had figured out why Jacob had yet to shed a tear. Why Jacob Black had yet to look at her with sadness. He was in shock and denial. He didn't want to believe it.

"No Jacob.." Leah reached out slowly to grip onto Jake's hand "I'm dying…"

Jacob froze, his body began to shake as well as his head. It had finally begun to sink in as he dropped to his knees in front of Leah, slowly shaking and crying. The sobs echoed throughout her room and his hand began to clutch hers harder.

"No.. You are strong baby, you are going to make it through this. You are going to.. You have to." Jacob cried. His head was buried in her torso and one of her hands had moved towards his hair.

"I'm not strong enough to make it through this Jacob.." a cough escaped past Leah's lips and her eyes began to get heavy. "Come and lie with me. Please… Come and hold me… Hold me like you did after the first time we made love. Hold me like you never want to let me go…"

Jacob slid into the bed beside Leah. His arms wrapped around her small frame and her head rested on his chest. Jacob could hear the faint heartbeat of Leah. The faint and almost non-existent heartbeat of Leah.

"Do you remember when you made us a picnic on first beach?" Leah whispered, her breathing suddenly became uneven and her eyes drifted closed.

Jacob nodded "I had made you such a nice picnic Lee.. It had all your favorites. But since we are in La Push, the weather sucked and all our food got soaked as it began to rain…"

"I didn't mind though…" Leah whispered, her finger intertwining with Jacobs.

"Yeah…" Jacob whispered through tears.. "Because it was the first time you told me that…"

He was interrupted by the sound of Leah's faint heartbeat coming to a stop.

"I love you…"

The tears formed in Jacobs eyes as he heard the final breath of Leah Clearwater. His girlfriend, the girl that he had said would be his future wife. Sobs echoed throughout the room as he clutched onto Leah tight. Placing kisses all over her face as if it would bring her back to life. He finally placed a kiss on her lips before letting out a piercing scream of pain.

"Leah…. NO, Leah.. Come back to me baby.. Please.. I love you.. Come back…" he cried. "LEAH"

As everyone rushed into the room, tears staining their faces, Jacob rushed out of the room and into the lounge area. He couldn't bare to be there, the tears rushed down his face and the need to scream out became more and more stronger. He stuffed his hands in his pockets as the need to smash something became strong.

Rustling about in his pocket he felt a piece of paper. Opening it up, he began reading to himself through the thickness of his tears.

_Jacob Ephraim Black. _

_I love you. More than I have ever loved anyone before. You showed me that there is a bright side to everything, that there is something positive even if the time itself seems bad. I want you to remember this when I am no longer here with you. The venom is taking its course, I know that. I can feel it. _

_I love you Jake, so much. One day, you will be happy again, I can promise you that. You will find an imprint, or someone who will ease the pain of losing me. You will find someone who will make all that pain go away. I promise you that.  
Look after Seth for me, please? He is my pride and joy Jake. Take care of my brother.  
Finally Jake, I will always be watching down on you. Even when you start to move on from me, I will still be keeping an eye on you. I will watch down on you Jake. I promise. I will love you forever. I will be waiting for you Jake, when your time has come to visit me again… I will be here. But until then, I will be with my dad but always, always keeping an eye out on you. The man I love. _

_I love you so much Jacob.  
Love, Leah. _

Jacob read the letter more times than once, constantly reading it in his head before finally reading it allowed once. His eyes then travelled down the piece of paper to a poem.

_I aint got that long to live  
Life says that I'm going to die.  
So, what's going to happen to us?  
Before forever I lay to lie.  
Do I need to be dead  
Before a tear slides sorrowfully down your eye.  
'Cause when I'm dead, I'm gone  
Maybe and only then, you'll start to cry._

_Can you not see  
the irony?  
That in life out affinity died  
and only in death  
the awakening  
the infinitely  
it was always alive._

**Read and review? xx**


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